I wish I was there

Aahh, the Cayman Islands. I've been to Grand Cayman and that was pretty sweet and after a month of this crappy weather I am letting my mind drift to sunnier locations.

I wish I had a Dobie

This dog reminds me of our old family pet Baron. He was my favourite dog in the whole wide world. He was a super Dobermann. I miss him.

I wish I had a Temple.

Prambanan is the largest Hindu temple compound in Indonesia, located in central Java, approximately 18 km east of Yogyakarta. It was built around 850 CE by either Rakai Pikatan, king of the second Mataram dynasty or Balitung Maha Sambu, during the Sanjaya dynasty. Not long after its construction, the temple was abandoned and began to deteriorate.
The reconstruction of the compound began in 1918, and is currently unfinished. The main building has only been completed in 1953, since it is next to impossible to find the original stonework, which has often been stolen and reused at remote construction sites. A temple will only be rebuilt if at least 75% of the original stones are available. Therefore, from most of the smaller shrines one can still see not much more than their foundation walls.
Today, it is an UNESCO World Heritage Site and one of the largest Hindu temples in south-east Asia. It is characterised by its tall and pointed architecture, typical for the hindu temple architecture, and by the 47m high central building inside a large complex of individual temples.

The Olympics Not So Boring Afterall

I've been busy with work so I haven't really had a chance to research Guy Candy. However, while watching the Olympics the other night I came across a definate candidate. His name is Jeremy Bloom and he was a competitor in the freestyle moguls.
He's an American... Sorry.

More Bali

Bali Bali Bali

Bali is an Indonesian island located at 8°25′23″S, 115°14′55″E, and one of the Lesser Sunda Islands. It is in a chain with Java to the west and Lombok to the east. It is a popular tourist destination and, along with Java, known for its highly developed arts, including dance, sculpture, painting, leather and metalworking, and music, especially that played on the gamelan.
Bali lies 3.2 km east of Java and about 8 degrees south of the equator. It is 153 km long and 112 km wide (95 by 69 miles). Its surface area is 5,633 km². The highest point is Mount Agung, 3,142 m high (10,308 feet), an active volcano that last erupted in March 1963. Mountains range from the central to the eastern side, Mount Agung being the easternmost peak. Mount Batur, or what remains of it, is also still active. About 30,000 years ago it experienced a massive catastrophic eruption — one of the largest known volcanic events on Earth.
Bali is a richly diverse island of approximately 3.57 million people (2003 statistics).

Religion
Unlike most of Muslim-majority Indonesia, about 92% of Bali's population adheres to Balinese Hinduism, formed as a combination of existing local beliefs and Hindu influences from mainland Southeast Asia and South Asia. Minority religions include Islam (5.7%), Christianity (1.4%), and Buddhism (0.6%) (2003 statistics).
Language
Balinese and Indonesian are the most widely spoken languages in Bali, and many Balinese people are bilingual or even trilingual. English is a common third language owing to the island's large tourism industry.
Balinese is a rich and diverse language reflecting the population. In the past, the language was heavily influenced by the Balinese caste system, but this is becoming less and less pronounced.
Culture
Bali is famous for the arts, both the performing arts as well as painting, scuplture, and woodcarving. Balinese gamelan music is highly developed and varied. . Famous Balinese dances include Pendet, legong, baris (dance), topeng, barong, and many others.


Pretty place, just don't get killed by bombers.

AG's Found her Mojo!

Woohoo, finally the BloggerMojo.com network has been lauched! I told you all that I dreamed of total world domination and now I am one step closer to that goal. Mwahaha!!! It's brand-spankin' new so I don't know how many posts there will be for your viewing pleasure but rest assured you can find my rantings and enlightening posts on a couple of the sites. I have signed up for Flickmojo.com and Warmojo.com so keep an eye out for the utter brilliance that is me. I am and always shall be Angrygnome.

Black Toosday

Hey peeps, my dear friend over at Nefertitia's Loft has dubbed tomorrow "Black Tuesday" and I have taken a liking to the term to describe Valentine's Day so I am going to steal it for this post. Indeed, for those of us who are currently inhabiting the singledom world, the day isn't looked upon with glee as it tends to remind us of the fact that we are single. And alone. And living with cats... Oh God, oh God, oh God... Where are you Mr. Soulmate?
Despite the claims that relationships are "great" and "life-affirming" I sometimes wonder if indeed the grass is greener on the other side, you know what I mean?

Heaven on Earth is kind of stinky

Whatever you do do not look out your window right now because chances are, if you live in Montreal like me then you are currently witnessing a snowstorm. My suggestion is to look at your computer screen and read the following:

Pago Pago is the capital of American Samoa, a territory of the United States of America. Its 1990 population was 10,640. The city is located on Pago Pago Harbor, Tutuila. Tourism, government, and tuna canning are the primary industries. From 1878 to 1951, this was a coaling and repair station for the U.S. Navy.

A portion of the docks at Fagatogo in Pago Pago Harbor. In the background is the Rainmaker (Pioa Mtn.)
The city is an interesting mixture of a "seedy" urban area with infamously smelly tuna canneries (which provide employment for a third of the population of Tutuila), and a harbor surrounded by dramatic cliffs which plunge almost straight into the sea. A climb up to Mt Alava (see National Park of American Samoa) provides a magnificent bird's eye view of the harbor and town. Until 1980, one could experience the view from the peak by taking an aerial tramway over the harbor, but on April 14 of that year a US Navy plane, flying overhead as part of the Flag Day celebrations, struck the cable, the plane then crashing into a wing of the Rainmaker Hotel. The tram remains unusable to this day, although according to Lonely Planet, plans have been put forth to reopen it. Less spectacular, but worth the drive, is the view from the top of the pass above Aua Village on the road to Afono.
Pago Pago is actually but one of several villages along the shore of the harbor and is located at the very back (inside) of the embayment. However, because the name Pago Pago is associated with the harbor itself—the only significant port of call in American Samoa—Pago Pago is now generally applied to the harbor area and the capital. Thus, both the port itself and the legislature of American Samoa—known as the Fono (/ˈfoʊnoʊ/)—are located in Fagatogo, a village that is adjacent to (and for all practical purposes indistinguishable from) Pago Pago. Similarly, the once famous Rainmaker Hotel (now closed) is located in the village of Utule‘i, adjacent to Fagatogo along the south shore of the long harbor. The canneries are located in Atu‘u on the harbor north shore.

I've got a cold.

Personally, I blame the weather in Mtl.
I mean honestly, one day it's 3 degrees, the next it's minus freakin' 17. What's a girl to do? A girl gets a cold and flu and medicates herself heavily.
S w e e e e t.

Rockin' the Monday

After a nice relaxing weekend I am back at work and still enjoying it. (Surprise!) I am generally at my desk workin' the nine to five shift or walking around looking at our supplies. It may seem as though it's pretty easy and a monkey could do it but in fact I believe only a super-intelligent monkey could do it. There's so much to be in charge of, you know what I mean? In the past I have always worked with others to do it but now it's just little 'ol me and if something goes wrong well then it's just little ol' me that screwed up the order. We'll see how I respond.

Guy Candy: Ruckin' Sweet!

To usher in the brand spankin' new Super 14 2006 season I have decided to showcase some players.


1. Neil Powell, 29 yrs old.
Plays for the Bulls in Pretoria, SA


2. Tamati Ellison, 23 yrs old. (Yes Steffo, he's older than 20!)
Plays for the Hurricanes in Wellington, NZ


3. Peter Grant, 22 yrs old.
Plays for The Stormers in Cape Town

MMFA Exhibition. Who wants to come with?

Catherine the Great: Art for Empire.
In partnership with the State Hermitage Museum in Saint Petersburg, the Montreal Museum of Fine Arts presents Catherine the Great: Art for Empire. Masterpieces from the State Hermitage Museum, Saint Petersburg,from February 2 to May 7, 2006. This exhibition features more than 200 of the many treasures collected by the powerful and highly intelligent Empress Catherine II (1729-1796), arguably the eighteenth century’s greatest art collector and patron. Catherine believed in the political dimension of art and was convinced of her fundamental role in Russia’s social and cultural transformation. To illustrate the immense scope of her aspirations, the exhibition displays paintings, sculptures, furniture and decorative art objects. It also reveals her taste for classicism, which was new in Russia at the time. The snuff boxes in gold and precious stones, jewellery, cameos and intaglios that Catherine loved are displayed together, to re-create the Diamond Room, the Empress’s cabinet of precious objects in the Winter Palace. Many of these works of art and objects are being presented in North America for the first time; some have never before left the Hermitage.
Catherine’s dazzling coronation coach, exceptionally on loan from the Hermitage, is a highlight of the exhibition. It has travelled outside Russia only twice before: in 1991-1992 and in 1996. This is the last time it will be displayed abroad because of its fragile condition. The opulent coach was most likely commissioned by Peter the Great for the coronation ceremony of his wife, Catherine I.
Catherine the Great features major works of the eighteenth century commissioned, purchased or received by the Empress, including paintings and sculptures by Jean-Baptiste Siméon Chardin, Jean-Baptiste Greuze, Anton Raphael Mengs, Antoine Houdon, Angelica Kaufmann, Joseph Wright of Derby, Joshua Reynolds and Élisabeth Vigée-Lebrun, among others, as well as superb architectural drawings by Charles De Wailly, Charles-Louis Clérisseau, Jean-Louis Desprez and Charles Cameron. Among the furniture on display is a superb cylinder desk by the famous cabinet-maker David Roentgen. The exhibition also provides an opportunity to discover Russian artists and craftsmen. Various works and texts attest to Catherine’s relationships with some of the leading minds of her era, the Age of Enlightenment, such as Voltaire, Diderot and Grimm.
The exhibition is divided into five sections: Catherine of Russia, Philosopher Empress, Minerva of the North, Enlightened Patroness, Benefactress of the Arts and Manufactories. It delves into Catherine’s personality and legendary destiny and explores the ways in which she forged ties between Europe and Russia, simultaneously importing and encouraging the arts and cultural endeavours.

http://www.mmfa.qc.ca/forfaits/catherine/index_en.html

Mmm...Wine Country.

Franschhoek is a small town in the Western Cape Province and one of the oldest towns of the Republic of South Africa. The valley was originally settled in 1688 by French Huguenot refugees, many of whom were given land by the Dutch government in a valley called Oliphantshoek (Elephants Corner), so named because of the vast herds of elephants that roamed the area. The name of the area soon changed to Franschhoek (French Corner). Many of the settlers named their new farms after the areas in France from which they came. La Motte, La Cotte, Cabriere, Provence, Chamonix, Dieu Donne and La Dauphine were among some of the first established farms - most of which still retain their original farm houses. These farms have grown into regionally renowned wineries.
This heritage lives on today with the Huguenot monument standing proudly at the top of the village. The museum nearby chronicles the history of the first settlers, with each of the original Huguenot farms having its own fascinating story to tell.
The Cape Dutch architecture in much of the village is unspoiled with restrictions having been placed on the extent of renovations and new construction, to keep in the spirit of the original settlers to the area.
Once a sleepy country retreat, the village began experiencing a boom during the 1990's, which continues today. The construction of a new English Private School, Bridge House School, outside of the village attracted many urban dwellers to the village, and property prices began to soar.

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

What the...?

Wait, does anyone even know the Cyrillic or Greek alphabets? They're a little complicated but I've looked up the information for you to check them out.

You know, it's all Greek to me. Heh.

More Translations

Original sentence is "You suck".

French: Vous sucez

Dutch: U zuigt

German: Sie saugen

Greek: Απορροφάτε

Portuguese: Você suga

Italian: Succhiate

Russian: Вы всасываете

I love you Babelfish

My original sentence is "I am Lyndy, hear me roar."

Here are the translations:

French: Je suis Lyndy, m'entends hurler

Dutch: Ik ben Lyndy, hoor me gebrul

German: Ich bin Lyndy, höre mich zu brüllen

Greek: Είμαι Lyndy, με ακούω βρυχηθμός

Italian: Sono Lyndy, lo sento ruggire

Portuguese: Eu sou Lyndy, ouço-me rujir

Russian: Я буду Lyndy, слышу, что я реву

The Brilliance To Come

Hi peeps, seeing as today I am at reception for the entire duration (La receptioniste, she is sick!)I wanted to let you know that I will be posting a lot. There's nothing much to do here and although I have stuff to do I can't really do it from here so it's been put off until tomorrow. (Forced procrastination!)

I am now going to surf the web to find subjects of interest to share with you. Later.

Mine! Mine! Mine!

Guess what Gnomers? I am writing this post from my very own desk. It's pretty s w e e t after years of sharing my space with other people at work. People suck.

Later dudes.

The Jewel of KwaZulu-Natal

It seems like the perfect kind of day to discuss Durban.
Durban is a city in KwaZulu-Natal Province, South Africa (29°53′S 31°03′E). It is also known by the Zulu word eThekwini, (the meaning of which is unclear, but most likely is "lagoon" from the word itheku, or "at the harbour", although other shadier theories have been put forward). Since 2000, a number of towns, including Durban, have been part of the eThekwini Metropolitan Municipality.
Durban is being marketed as "South Africa's Playground". It has a population of about 3.1 million people with diverse cultures including a large Indian community making Durban the second largest city in South Africa.
While Johannesburg has embraced its new Afro-centric nature, and Cape Town has held on to its Euro-centric culture, Durban has emerged as an Ethno-centric city—a polyglot of Eastern, Western and African cultures, each of which give Durban a distinctly unique flavour.
Durban is primarily a "holiday city"/beach resort, but at the same time is Africa's busiest container port and has a substantial industrial sector. The port is one of the world's largest natural deep water ports.
The long continuous stretch of hotels that line the city's beachfront is known as Durban's Golden Mile.
Places of interest:
-The Golden Mile
-Roma Revolving Restaurant, similar to London's Post Office Tower (although smaller in scale), is a prominent building from the port with, as the name suggests, a rotating circular restaurant room that provides 360 degree views of the city, but it is sadly dated.
-The International Convention Centre (ICC)
-The port and waterfront, Beachfront, City Hall, Durban Horse Race Course, Berea, Umhlanga Rocks.
-The BAT centre
-The new aquarium, Durban's Aquarium - uShaka Marine World, one of the largest Aquariums in the world.
-Sahara Stadium Kingsmead is a major test match and one-day cricket venue.
-Kings Park Stadium(Now known as ABSA Stadium) is host to the Internationally renowned Sharks Rugby Team. Known for its post match entertainment.
-Outside of the city centre is the Valley of a Thousand Hills a dramatic geographical rock formation created by the Mngeni River and its tributaries.

*Feel free to daydream about sandy beaches and warm skies.

Pretoria: The Jacaranda City

Ah Pretoria, home of the Blue Bulls and the Bulls.

Pretoria is a city located in the northern part of Gauteng Province, South Africa. It is one of the country's three capital cities, serving as the executive (administrative) capital; the other two being Cape Town and Bloemfontein, respectively the legislative and judicial capitals. It is contained in the City of Tshwane Metropolitan Municipality, and therefore sometimes incorrectly referred to as Tshwane — this contentious issue is still being decided as of January 2006; see the discussion further down in this article.
The city has a population of approximately one million (or two million if the whole of the Tshwane metropolitan area is included). The main languages spoken in Pretoria include Tswana, Ndebele, Afrikaans, and English,
Pretoria is one of South Africa's leading academic cities, and it is home to both the largest residential university in the country (the University of Pretoria) and the largest distance education university (the University of South Africa, more commonly known by its initials, UNISA). The South African Council for Scientific and Industrial Research (CSIR) is also located in this city.
Interesting facts
-Pretoria's main street, Church Street, is the longest urban street in South Africa and one of the longest straight streets in the world.
-Many of the city's streets are lined with Jacaranda trees that blossom mauve (purplish blue) in spring, giving rise to the city's nickname "Jacaranda City".
-The Cullinan Diamond (the largest gem diamond ever found) was discovered in the town of Cullinan near Pretoria at the Premier Mine on January 26, 1905.
-Pretoria has the second largest number of embassies in the world after Washington, D.C..
-Pax Praetoriana was named after Pretoria.

Copyright (C) 2000,2001,2002 Free Software Foundation, Inc.
51 Franklin St, Fifth Floor, Boston, MA 02110-1301 USA
Everyone is permitted to copy and distribute verbatim copies
of this license document, but changing it is not allowed.
http://en.wikipedia.org

Het Suikergoed van het oog

All those words roughly translate into "Eye Candy" in Dutch, or so Babelfish tells me.


1. Carter Oosterhouse


2. Ty Pennington


3. Paul McElligott

They're all carpenters so one would assume they're good with their hands. Whatever that means. Or something, I don't know, it's a little early for me.

The Angry Cyber Traveller

I have noticed that I haven't really been posting any pictures of late so I am starting a new weekly ritual of sharing with you pictures of places I would like to visit or that vaguely amuse me. As some of you know or may have noticed, I have an inexplicable love-affair with South Africa so I have chosen a lovely overhead vista of Cape Town as the first in the series. She's lovely, isn't she? No one really knows where the love comes from, not even the AG herself but alas, what are you gonna do? Here are some interesting tidbits for you:

Cape Town (Afrikaans Kaapstad), city in southwestern South Africa, the legislative capital of the country and the capital of Western Cape province. Cape Town is one of three national capitals, along with Pretoria (the executive capital) and Bloemfontein (the judicial capital). It is situated at the northern end of the Cape Peninsula, about 50 km (about 30 mi) north of the Cape of Good Hope. The city has a spectacular setting, cradled by the steep slopes of Table Mountain to the south, Devil’s Peak to the southeast, Lion’s Head to the southwest, and Signal Hill to the west. Table Bay, an inlet of the Atlantic Ocean, lies to the northwest. The site of the first European settlement in South Africa (founded in 1652), Cape Town is today a major port, an industrial hub, and a center of culture and tourism. The city has a Mediterranean climate, with warm, dry summers and cool, wet winters.
"Cape Town," Microsoft® Encarta® Online Encyclopedia 2005http://encarta.msn.com © 1997-2005 Microsoft Corporation. All Rights Reserved.

Interesting word this is

You know what is a funny word? Spelunking. Now I just have to find relevance of it in my life so I can use it more frequently.

New setting

Hi y'all, greetings from Nicholl Paskell-Mede. I am here for a week trial and then if they want me I suppose I will start full-time in early March. So far, so good. It's a pretty laid-back environment here, despite the fact that it's a law firm but I think it depends on what kind of law they specialize in and in NPM's case, it's the exciting world of insurance law. Oooh indeed.
I am now at reception alone and I don't feel freaked out at all, it's really just another console and honestly, after SS, nothing can be that bad. Anyhoo, the phones aren't ringing so it's been relatively slow but at least I have the internet, which I am pretty psyched about because now I can write to you all often. And with feeling.

Snow: God's Idea of Tidying Up?

In the past I have tried not to complain too much about snow because it's pretty, makes MTL look clean and also gives me the traction I need to walk the treacherous side-streets. I don't know what it is but when there is a substantial snowfall I just get a warm and cuddly feeling and I suppose it reminds me of my childhood in Noyan where snow always meant snowball fights, ice skating on the lake in front of the house and warm beverages next to the fire.

Quite idyllic, actually.

P.S. I know some of you may be wondering when Guy Candy will resurface in 2006 and I wanted to let you know that there are plans to revive the weekly tradition but I am currently still researching the candidates. It's a tireless search but oh what I won't do for my dedicated Gnomers :P
What do you think of carpenters? There seems to be quite a large pool of Guy Candy worthy men in the profession. Keep your eyes open for updates.

My Office Space

... Looks a lot like my living room.

So I have been working from home the last couple of days and it's a w e s o m e. I must say, it really works for me, I like the independence and that fact that my bed is just upstairs for power naps. Unfortunately, I do believe the work will be finshed by tomorrow which means I will have to go back dowtown but for now I am basking in the freedom of the situation. Oh, ok - I admit it, I also relishing the napping hours.

Is Kiwi a Dave Chappelle or Seinfeld fan?

Do animals have a sense of humour?

Yeah, I was wondering that earlier today when I did something kinda stupid which made me chuckle to myself. I then began to wonder if Kiwi, who had witnessed the scene thought it was funny too and had an internal dialogue much like this: "God, she is such an idiot... Heh."

Does anyone have any information on this subject or do I have to get out more? I'm gonna go with the latter but I can't be the only one who has ever thought about it so there must be studies out there.

Thanks from the AG: Straight from the heart.

God, I hate Bryan Adams.

A n y h o o, I just wanted to take a moment to thank the kind Gnomers who came out for by birthday on Saturday night and for all who couldn't come or "forgot", y'all can chew on some glass.

Here are some thoughts on the evening:

-Steffo you were in fine form and I'm sorry he didn't call, we'll work on it and if it comes to it, I know people who know people, if you know what I mean.

-Scott you were all up in my grill but at least you got me Zoolander. Ahem. Gee, I wonder how it ends?

-The lovely Miss C, it was nice to see you again although I wasn't too psyched to learn I was going to die at seventy.

-Mr. Muddler, I was honoured that you came to my little get-together and if we haven't emotionally scarred you too much there's an open invitation to all of our sporiadic get-togethers, I think you're "good people". Not at all like your naughty sister.

Seriously though, thanks for all the birthday wishes - maybe twenty-nine won't be so bad afterall!

The date, time and place!

January 14th.
7pm - ish
The Old Orchard Pub on Monkland in NDG.

Be there or be square.

*All friendly Gnomers are cordially invited to drop by for a Happy Birthday pint. I'll probably eat something there so feel free to stay for dinner. The more the merrier!

AG's Path to Enlightenment

I have come to the conclusion that the path to true happiness in one's life is not nirvana or religious rhetoric but rather to live each and every day slightly drunk. Case in point, today I wasn't having such a great day, as Mondays tend to be, but in the afternoon my brother called me for an important "meeting" at the Old Orchard Pub and then the day wasn't so bad. I generally don't condone drinkng on a Monday afternoon but after today all I can really say is "Why the hell not?" I mean really, if raging alcoholism is the only way I can be interesting and oh-so-witty then why not devote the rest of my life to pints and pubs? I can honestly say that I am not that interesting sober.

Oh, and by they way, anyone who is up for it may join me in my debauchery this weekend to celebrate by twenty-nith year on this planet. All invited. Woo-woo!

* I just want to clarify that although I wrote that I wasn't interesting sober I didn't mean that I wasn't all that. Because I am. Plus a box of cracker Jacks. Anyhoo, I think I believe what I meant to say is that I'm more interesting when I'm slightly toasted which is, I know, totally unfair to all those who suck because they aren't me.

Singledom vs. Online Dating

I've mentioned it before but just to recap for those who don't read my blog regularly or don't know how to access the archives (either consult with the all-knowing Muddler or you know, go to right of this page and click), I have entered the world of online dating and despite the favourable responses I have recieved from it, I just don't feel totally comfortable. I don't know what it is exactly, on paper it seems like the perfect thing for me, as I am generally shy and reserved in person when meeting strangers but, to me at least, it seems kind of unnatural to shop around for potentials, you know what I mean? I feel guilty for not responding to people so I answer all emails and then find myself in the awkward situation of having to correspond with men I have no intention of dating.
Anyhoo, although I know I have to take more of a proactive role in my love-life it has been experience that for the most part when we look for love it's gone out for coffee so I say "Take your time man, I'll be here blogging". Besides, I don't date well, I'm too aloof. I grow on people like ivy or a fungus. A loveable fungus. To know me is to love me.
You know, on the topic of online dating can I just recommend the Onion personals as well as Lemontonic? I freely admit to not liking Lavalife, the site is too, I don't know, red. Plus, since they have that Instant Messenger thing it always takes my computer forever to load the page. I like sites that are simple to use and that I get interesting responses from so Lemontonic has been a good choice. I also thought that anyone who uses the Onion's personals has to have read The Onion so at least we've got a sence of humour in common to start from.

Peace out and remember this wise advice some guy on the street once gave me:
"He who is cold must remember to wear mittens."

Twenty-nine 'till I die.

As my twenty-ninth birthday is just around the corner I have come to the decision that it is the age I will publicly acknowledge for the next decade. I thought you Gnomers should know because any breach of information about my true age down the road will result in a vicious neckslap and a "shut your face". You know, FYI and everything.

Lamenting the loss of Muffin

Despite all my best efforts, Muffin will be leaving to work at another site. Here is a Haiku I wrote:

Ah, Muffin, away you shall go
Do not, do not get stuck in the snow.

Lies and Deception

Yeah, I was asked by my manager last night to do some overtime and as I am a dunce par excellence I agreed to it. This is the scenario, I woke up at came into work for 9am and then I worked it and did my thang. After work I went to my first class that lasted from 6-8:25 and then I walked back from the Hall building to start the job. When I agreed to the job I thought it was just straight on copying but as I browsed through the boxes I realized there were countless envelopes which were filled with reciepts. Apparently, there were people being audited and now I was copying their expenses for the last fifteen years. Ugh. Needless to say, a job that I was told would take me three hours maximum took me NINE hours. I was so tired and angry when I left at 3am this morning I felt like slapping the next person I saw but alas, it was not meant to be as the first person was a large security guard.

Much Ado About Something.

Yesterday on MPix they aired Twelf Night and Much Ado About Nothing and I have to say, although I have seen them both before, I watched them again and thorougly enjoyed them. If I were forced to choose between them both I guess I would have to say Twelf Night is the better film. Solely on the merits of Toby Stephens and his lovely eyebrows.

After the holidays...

...And I need to go back on vacation! Honestly.
I hope you all had a nice time over the holiday season and are looking forward to 2006! I know I am. Kind of. Well, not really but mostly because we're selling the condo and I need to find a new place to live in May. If there are any of you out there who know of places that are available, please contact me. I need all the help I can get.

Link-a-licious!

Ok, so I know my links area is getting a little bit busy but really, what am I supposed to do? There are a lot of sites out there I think you should visit. Anyhoo, I have added a couple of new friendly gnomers whose sites are of interest. The Muddler is, what I believe the kids these days call a technophile or digirati. He seems to know what he's talking about even if some of the time I, sadly, do not. Happily, sprinkled throughout the computer geek (No dis Muddler, I hold computer geeks in the highest esteem.) lingo are blogs about music and miscellaneous things.
I've also added George the Dog's blog. George lives with my longtime friend Lola and her boyfriend Jim in San Francisco. It's new and I don't really know much about it but Lola and I have known each other for over 15 years and she's never led me down a wrong path. Except that one time when we killed that drifter...
Finally, if you're in the mood for love or want to look for love in all the wrong places go and check out Lemontonic: The Revolution in Online Dating. The site is easy to use and pleasant to look at.

Oh yeah, and I've added The Onion because it's always made me laugh.

FreeVu Concert

Not for everyone I know but I thought my Gnomers should be in the know.

FreeVu concert featuring Robbie Williams!

Synopsis: Spend New Year's Eve with superstar Robbie Williams in stunning HD! Recorded Live in Berlin and airing for the first time in North America. Don't miss this incredible show on December 31st at 7 p.m. & 1 a.m. (ET)

Time Machine

Ok, take a journey with me back through time to the magical decade of the 80s when a odd little lady named Cyndi ruled the airwaves. I admit it, I like Cyndi Lauper.(I was never much interested in being cool). I remember when I was a girl who just wanted to have fun, drive all through the night and see people's true colours before Phil Collins came and cheesed it out. I mean, seriously people, she was on the Goonies soundtrack, the Goonies. Anyway, to make a point of some kind, I bought her CD called The Twelve Deadly Cyns... and then Some and I am enjoying it. Although I was pretty young back in the 80s I do remember the songs and where I was at thatt time in my life. Good clean fun. Remember when times were fun? Remember when they were clean? Now? Not so much.

The Space Between

Really though, what is the purpose of coming into work when no one else is here? First of all, I had to postpone my vacay because the Powers that Be let everyone in their department go therefore everyone in my department had to stay over the holidays. Nothing is truer than the old saying "Most people suck". Ok, so maybe it's not an old saying per se but something that is tried and true in my vocab.

Anyhoo, I hope you all had a nice Christmas and Hanukah. I don't think I know anyone who celebrates Kwanzaa but if I do, I apologize and I hope you had a nice Kwanzaa too.

Lo, how a rose ever blooming?

Happy Holidays Gnomers!
As many of you will have no doubt noticed, that splendid time of year has arrived when peace on earth reigns and so on. I hope all of you have gotten all your Christmas shopping done and are enjoying the festive season. I also wanted to take the opportunity to thank all my loyal readers for sticking with me through thick and thin (mostly thin!) on this blog. Merci beaucoup for your interest and support to Steffo, Sooz, Sheen, the Muddler and mon petit chou Scott. If there are others then I'm sorry for not mentioning you but I give you my props.

Sleeper Cell

After a nice relaxing weekend I have come back to you to recommend a new show that I saw on TMN tonight. It seems to have been on for a little while before it came to my attention but now that it has I felt compelled to share it with you. Brought to us from the people at Showtime (which means you can't see the damned official site!) it follows Darwin Al-Sayeed an American-Muslim who is undercover and has infiltrated an extremist sleeper cell in LA. Compelling and well-acted, it definately is worth the time to check it out. I believe the new episodes are shown on Sundays at 10pm and is rerun on Tuesdays and Saturdays.

P.S. Eric, the show isn't a "Terminally"-Canadian production. It looks and feels like a movie. No financial shortcuts to be seen.

Guy Candy: Down with the Swirl

1. Michael Ealy


2. Tony Leung Chiu Wai













3. Gary Dourdan

It smells like salami at EY

I have been sitting at the reception for the past hour and I keep on getting these strong whiffs of salami or olives, I don't know which but it's beginning to tick me off.

Guy Candy - I can't believe it's not butter!

1. William Fichtner

2. Julian McMahon

3. Chris Evans

The Reclusive Exclusive

Eh, what's up doc?
After a slight absence from the blogging world I have returned refreshed and ready to share with the world my thoughts, stupid things that interest me, and guy candy. Speaking of which, I will post GC tomorrow and I think it's good but you know, you can't make everyone happy so anyone who disagrees with my choices please be nice because I am, afterall, a gentle soul. (Stop snickering). If you can't be nice then you can, you know, go to hell.

Anyhoo, has anyone else been having trouble posting because I have. Admittedly, I haven't been willing to write a lot in the past couple of weeks but when I have made the effort to sign into the site I have been met with resistance at every turn! Sheesh, it's like there's a conspiracy out there of people who don't want the Gnomish word heard. I blame the people and Muffin.

I'm posting a picture of a cat because I like cats.

Have you seen this boy?

Please notify local authorities as the little dude is a jerk and needs to be neckslapped often to have any common sense whatsoever.

Guy Candy on Vacation

Guy Candy will not be posted this week due to the fact that I am starting my mini-vacation in a couple of minutes and can't be bothered. I haven't done any research and would rather put my whole ass into the project and not just half of it.

C.S. Lewis: Not Daniel Day-Lewis' Papa

Hear ye, hear ye!
I am posting this because I was wrong about telling Steffo that C.S. Lewis was Daniel Day-Lewis' father. After looking it up on IMDB I found out his father was Cecil Day-Lewis, Poet Laureate of England.

Hogwarts Express Slightly Off-Track

Ok, so I have taken the time to collect my thoughts on the new Harry Potter movie and I have come to the conclusion that while it may be my favourite book in the entire series so far, as a movie it was kind of disappointing. I can't really put my finger on what it is that left me with this feeling, I suppose I felt it was a little choppy and although I am fully aware that certain parts of the book had to be skipped because of time constraints, my question is why make up new storylines when the original ones stayed true to the past ones and could come in handy for future films? Where were the house elves and S.P.E.W? Where were the oldest Weasly brothers? Why did Voldermort look like the burnt guy from the English Patient?
You know, I hate to put the blame on director Mike Newell's shoulders alone but I think he may have been the wrong choice for the franchise thusfar. Mona Lisa Smile? Pushing Tin? Mediocre movies at best. Four Weddings and a Funeral was a goood film but at the other end of the spectrum in terms of movie genres. Say what you want about the quality of Chris Columbus' other films, at least he knew how to bring the whimsy. You know what people? Columbus understood that the film was first and foremost a fantasy and I think he did an admirable job in bringing that to the screen with the first two movies. Alfonso Cuaron also did a splendid job with Prisoner of Azkaban and although his vision for the film was more solemn and moody, at least he held true to the spirit of the series. In all honesty, I felt this film fell flat and lacked the magic the first three had. I guess I can only hope that David Yates' Order of the Pheonix will get this franchise back on track after a slight derailment.

Wimpering into a theatre near you

People, I am a little concerned over the lack of publicity surrounding the opening of the new Harry Potter movie. So far the only trailers I have seen have been on the internet and it troubles me over the lack of interest from the public and the movie studio distributing it. I just had a mini panic attack because I thought that perhaps I had mixed up the release date but then I remembered Stef had already bought our tickets so I am right about November 18th. Dudes, what's the problem with publicizing the movie? I have a feeling it's going to be a bitchin' movie but the apathy currently surrounding it disturbs me.

Guy Candy: The Other White Meat

1. Viggo Mortensen

2. Hayden Christensen

3. Ryan O'Reilly... oops, I mean Dean Winters

Happy Tree Friends

Like cartoons? Like cute and cuddly forest animals? Like violence?

Man, have I got a recommendation for you in that genre! A couple of days ago Everett a.k.a "Muffin" bought a DVD set of this little known cartoon and during some downtime at the end of the day we decided to watch it. Holy crap, it was one of the most violent cartoons I have ever seen. Ever. It was horrifying and yet it was funny. I mean, really, squirrels, bunnies, and beavers getting decapitated and impaled on branches? Definately not everyone's cup of tea but if you're into animated stuff it's worth a check.

"Good Grief" Book Review

No, I'm not going to discuss this week's "Peanuts" cartoon but rather a nice little book by Lolly Winston. "Good Grief" tells the story of Sophie Stanton, a thirty-six year old woman dealing with the death of her beloved husband Ethan. At the beginning of the book she isn't dealing with his death particularly well, she crashes her car through the garage, enters into a food depression and finally goes to work with her bathrobe and bunny slippers on. Needless to say, Sophie's life isn't going particularly well and after some intensive therapy and a visit from her dad she gets back on her feet and decides to make some life changes. That's pretty much all of part one but I am going to save part two and three for you to read for yourselves because then what's the point of reading it?
It's not a long or difficult read, I would categorise it as entertaining. It's kind of bittersweet and for anyone who has ever lost someone close to them it will definately strike a chord of familiarity. Personally, I lost someone very close to me eleven years and approximately 15 days ago and the truth is you never really get over it. There are birthdays and the anniversary of their deaths that constantly bring the sense of loss back to you. I think you get over the shock of it and even though your life goes on there's always something that reminds you of them and although you may feel like sitting in a dark room for days with your memories more often than not you won't have that luxury and you have to keep on keepin' on.
Honestly, I liked this story because it reminded me of my experiences after my friend's death and even though the story itself doesn't parallel my own, the emotions do. It's nice to know that you're not alone in your grief.

Ick Factor Eight and Rising

Yeah, I come from the old-school tradition of not wanting to know too much about my co-workers (except Muffin) but my new boss doesn't seem to adhere to the same ideas. Case in point, yesterday my boss, who shall remain nameless, decides to share with all of us the fact that he and his girlfriend were thisclose to opening a sex shop. In addition to that, he seems pretty well versed in the whole "toy" business, which is pretty disturbung if you knew him. (Hell, you don't have to even know him, he's a white fortyish guy with a twenty year old girlfriend) But I digress, so he tells us he had everything lined up and at the last minute something fell through and he couldn't open the shop but now he and his girlfriend want to get into the "Sex Toy" parties a la Tupperware parties. I swear to God, Everett and I think they may have an "open relationship" and be swingers, he honestly gives off that vibe. Now everytime he talks to me my mind reverts to his stories and I get weirded out. Today he started to tell a story to Mel and I and I put up my heand and commanded "Stop right there" and thankfully he did.

Eureka!

Well people, I have finally found something that overshadows my shallowness - my lameness! Gosh, I found myself wholeheartedly singing "Holding out for a Hero" in the shower last night. (I remember the song from Footloose when he's doing the chicken race on the tractor)

Am I Shallow?

Yes.
Yes I am.

Guy Candy: Rule Britannia

Hopefully, this week's choices will get a better response than last week. You people suck.


1. Rupert Evans

2. Matthew Mardsen

3. Clive Owens

I so excited!

Woo-woo! Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire is here in less than two weeks! Keep posted for news regarding the film on AG.

The Michael Revisited

I found a delicious picture of Michael Vartan online the other day and felt compelled to add it. I know he's already been on Guy Candy but I find looking at him is like being on heroine... I always need another fix.

How about "A mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in bacon"?

Ok, so in my quest to get over someone I recently joined the world of online dating via Lavalife. So far it's been pretty successful and most the men seem relatively normal but some guys have to rethink their profile headlines. I don't know about you but when I'm browsing and see a headline like "U & I: Meant for each other" I tend to try and find my happy place and kinda move on. Or when they're like "Live Life to the Fullest". Whatever. Find some new material, you know what I mean? I hate to be picky and I know writing about yourself can be awkward for some (not me, as you may have already noticed) but if you take the time to think about what you're going to write instead of writing something unoriginal then you're not going to be remembered as being just that.

P.S. The title of this post was brought to you by some dude on Lavalife and I kind of liked it. I'm kinda weird though, so there you go.

Furry voices

I'd like to think if Kiwi could talk she would sound like Antonio Banderas a-la Puss'n Boots. I also think that Whitey would sound like Marlee Matlin.

The Artistic Temperament

In a fit of rage over not being able to write anything I hit my computer and now some of the keys stick. Stoopid Dell. Dude, you gotta get a Dell my ass.

Jane Austen Re-Incarnated? I think not.

I have just spent the last hour writing the worst two opening sentences for my novel. Ever. Needless to say, I am going to work on them tonight because although Nanowrimo doesn't say that a person's novel has to be good I would like to think mine wouldn't want to make anyone vomit.
Perhaps I am over-thinking the situation. I mean, I like to write for fun and just type out what comes to mind but now that there's meaning behind it I can't seem to get motivated.

I'm a little tired of chick-lit at the moment and I want to write something that is set apart from the other stories. What about a story about a gang of mutant vampire monkeys that terrorize a small Idaho town?

Meh, I'll think about it.

Guy Candy: Who The Hell Are These Guys?

Just kidding, I obviously know was I picked them but do you know them?

1. Peter Sarsgaard

2. Gabriel Macht

3. Matthew Davis

Whoa, for once I am ahead of schedule. I rock the kasbah.

Jammies: Are they casual wear?

I can now openly state that I love my jammies. I am no longer ashamed to admit it. If my jammies were in the form of a man, I would marry them.

It's All About The Taglines

I've compiled a list of the best and worst movie taglines. Feel free to add those I've overlooked.

The best:

• Welcome to the suck - Jarhead
  
• Something Wicked This Way Comes - Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
  
• Lie, cheat, steal, rinse, repeat - Matchstick Men
  
• Does For Rock'n'Roll What The Sound Of Music Did For Hills - This is Spinal Tap
  
• They'll never get caught. They're on a mission from God - The Blues Brothers
  
• Leisure rules - Ferris Bueller's Day Off
  
• Fear can hold your prisoner. Hope can set you free - The Shawshank Redemption
  
• Stealing, cheating, killing. Who said romance was dead? - True Romance
  
• See it with a Bud - Dazed and Confused
  
• A smash hit romantic comedy. With zombies - Shawn of the Dead
  

The worst:

• Prince's First Feature Film - Purple Rain
  

Insane in the Membrane

Well folks, the end of the month is near and I have come to the realization that I may have gotten myself in over my head with this whole NaNoWriMo thing. I mean sure, I know how to write and for the most part have the ability to string together a few coherent sentences here and there but 50,000 words? Am I serious? God, I don't know why I thought I could undertake such a task, I can't even respond to emails when I'm having a bad day, what if I have an entire bad month? It's not that I don't have ideas, they're all stuck up there in my brain with all my repressed memories but to unlock them might prove to be a dangerous thing. I shudder at the thought of writing a bad romance novel a-la-Danielle-Steel variety. I swear to God, if I write one sentence that resembles "His rippling forearm musles tore at her lace bodice with fury" I will jump off the top of PVM. (Damn, I think I just dry-heaved when I read over my brief foray into Harlequin romance territory.)

P.S. Wish my luck in November.

Purple Rain... The Horror... The Horror

Who needs Michael Myers with a butcher's knife when all you really need for a screamfest is Prince with a script? A little while ago my friend Nefertitia posted a blog about Purple Rain and I laughed and posted a comment but couldn't really write anything profound or worthwhile as I had never seen the movie because of my parents censorship in my younger days. However, a couple of weeks ago on the MuchMoreMusic network they decided to air the movie so I checked it out and let me tell you I have made some bad choices in my life but this one will zoom right to the top of them. It wasn't even so bad it was funny or anything, it was so bad it was, you know, bad. I have seen horror movies and then moved on but this movie with haunt the rest of my days. Eeek, Prince in spandex and high heel boots, Prince making out with that Appolonia chick, Prince slapping her for no good reason... The list goes on and on.
Honestly, Halloween's just around the corner and if you're looking for something to chill you to the bone with fright then this is the movie for you.

Nightime is the Write-time

It has occured to me that I only really hit my creative peak in the wee hours of the morning. Perhaps this is the best time to write my novel? I suppose the only problem that creeps up is that I have a full-time day job and my work will no doubt suffer. Can I handle both? Probably not. Do I care enough about my job? Kind of. (It pays the bills). Is life without a creative outlet worth it? Definately not. I need to feel as though I have accomplished something worthwhile outside the walls of work and if I lose sleep and patience then perhaps it is all worth it if I am satisfied with the end result. Work be damned, I'm going for the glory.

Guy Candy So Sweet It's Bad For Your Teeth!

Hear ye, hear ye, Guy Candy returns for your viewing pleasure!

1. Jack Davenport

2. Michael Vartan

3. Scott Speedman

Yawn, Part Deux

I noticed that I have already had a "Yawn" post so I had to differentiate it from the first. Anyhoo, how is everyone? I am fine although I was a tad under the weather this weekend and my mother's friend died so I was dragged out of my comfy-ass bed to attend a wake on Sunday. Sounds like fun? Yeah, um, no.
Today was yet another day I would rather forget as it was busy, busy, busy and I never felt really settled all day, mostly because I was running around like a chicken without a head. I am hoping tomorrow brings a more laid-back feelin'.

Guy Candy, she is back!

1. Tyler Christopher

2. Simon Baker

3. Mark Collier

Finally, I got to post a new blog! Enjoy and I personally like number three.

Guy Candy Delayed... Again!

Sorry folks, I have spent the last twenty minutes trying to upload pictures for Guy Candy but met with resistance from the site. (I don't know why)
Hopefully I'll find some time tomorrow at work to post the blog so I won't be threatened in the halls of EY.

Everett the Hijacker

Sorry peeps, I left my blog open and mon petit ami Everett decided to post something. Isn't he special?

No good son-of-a...